Malignant and Fatal

I have read a book title 'Confessions of Shoppoholic' and I was so like the character Rebecca Bloomwood. I just can'tm get rid of my impulses to buy things that are unnecessary and are actually rubbish.

I've come to realize how much time I spent pretending that I know.

I know NOTHING.

When I lookback, I was not the same me anymore. Where have the achievements gone, what happened to the confidence?

Is it suppose to happen? Was I too arrogant and self-centered?

I'm in a downfall even before getting to the top.

It's killing me...

More to0 Motherhood

It's my Yeshua's 2nd month birthday today. She's sick with colds and cough and have given her the medication she needs. It makes me sad knowing that she's still too young to be suffering that however thankful that God made her strong enough to endure her health's tribulation.

There's a lot more to motherhood than just the mere pain of giving birth. Worrying for the young is irrevocable especially when she cries seamlessly, i really mean seamless.

I appreciate more what my Mom have gone through when she raised me and I will always thank her for waking up in the evening even if she's very tired, sacrificing her meal just to attend to her crying child, stop investing in make ups and clothes just to buy milk and diaper.

If not for love I may not enjoy life.

If not for love I may not be born.

Nostalgic

The first day we met was so memorable.

We were grade five then, he was a transferee and I was a bully, yes, a girl bully. He was shy at first and I wanted him to sing for the whole class, he was just silently sitting at the back seat when I realized that I embarrased him and drove him to cry. I don't know if I was to laugh or feel guilty about it. Since then, he hated me. He does everything that he can to annoy me, and he was really annoying, like so annoying.

I cursed him and promised to myself that if ever this guy will court me, I will never ever lay an eye on him, but I was wrong, he was the first, the last and the only love in my life.

I miss those days when he mocks me because I knew atleast he recognizes me no matter how silly I was then.

:)

I miss my love.

Wedding Plans

I'll be posting our wedding plans here.

Feel free to put your suggestions or comments also.

Wedding Plans

Geee... Is this for real?

I'm really going to get married. Though I'm not ready yet, I know I will be in time.

I already have the song choice for the wedding march and the ones who'll be part of the entourage.

I'm not that excited for the wedding. I'm more excited for the life after the wedding.

:)

Missing You So Much

I miss you when something really good happens, because you are the one I want to share it with. I miss you when something is troubling me, because you are the one who understands me so well. I miss you when I laugh and cry because I know that you are the one that makes my laughter grow and my tears disappear. I miss you all the time, but I miss you most when i lay awake at night and think of all the wonderful times we spent with each other;for those were some of the best times of my life.

A Dream of A Lifetime

I wish that I could hold you now, I wish that I could touch you now, I wish that I could talk to you, be with you somehow. But then again distance between two hearts is not an obstacle rather a beautiful reminder of just how strong true love can be.

Life without you and with someone else is unimaginable.

You are my dream of a lifetime.

You Are My You

I can never find anyone else that could ever replace my lovey and even if I can, I still won't!

A New Stage

This has been the happiest moment in my life to date.

Even when I was young, I never wished hard for fame, money and success that much than I wished for a complete and a happy home, a family that I will call my own. One that is full of love.

Now that Jog2 and I are going to have our first child, I can truly say that this is what I have been dreaming of. The feeling of an expectant mother is amazing and fulfilling. I'm excited entering parenthood, especially that we are together (Jog2 and I) on it. It's a very nice experience. It's revolutionizing my whole being.

I'm happy. That's it!

I thank everyone who understood and who didn't despise me despite of my mistakes. It was a mistake for some, yes I may agree, but it was a sweet mistake. I also thank Jog2 for taking the responsibility and being a father to our child even beforehand, my mom and dad and siblings never abandoned me instead they made me feel loved. With them, I can be vulnerable.

I'm happy for this new stage in our lives.

I promise to love my baby and my lovey unconditionally.